A Mindful Parable: The Dad Who Binged on Chocolate and Coffee ALL WEEKEND!
The Sunday Best Round Up #22
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Several weekends ago things went a bit awry.
My wife was away and I was, in true Macaulay Culkin style, home alone.
A 50 year old man with little that can pass for common sense...
3 teenage daughters and all the joy that such years bringâŚ
What could possibly go wrong?
Well it wasnât the whole parenting bit that was the problem.
Normally isnât.
That was fun.
Usually is.
We enjoyed high class dining in 2 fine American establishments here in the UK.
Hello Wendyâs!
Hello Subway!
We went shopping.
We walked the dogs.
We played Roblox âDress to Impressâ
TDLR - It's an online game where you go around as a runaway model trying on outfits and then get âjudgedâ at the end. As you might imagine my fashion sense and in-game skills were limited, being an oldie-baldieâ˘ď¸. Much to my daughter's amusement.
It was all fun ânâ games and so it really wasn't the parenting that was the problemâŚ
Nope - the wheels came off with my chronic over-eating and caffeine drinking
As Iâve shared before Iâve lived most of my life over-eating hugely.Â
Finally got some therapy this year, and so for the first time ever I feel largely in control of my eating.
I said largelyâŚ
Still prone to the odd lapse.
Which happened that weekend.
My big vulnerability for overeating is tired-ness.
And I went into that weekend short on sleep, having picked my eldest daughter up from a Halloween party at 2am on the Thursday night.
So on the Friday we all went to Wendyâs.
But I didn't really eat.
Instead I got super carried away with the refillable Dr. Pepper Zero and had 4 big cups in 20 minutes.
(I think I need to add âgetting value for money with fizzy drinksââ to that earlier list of addictions).
I was absolutely buzzing on sweeteners, preservatives, and caffeine.
I came home and ate a huge potato with chicken and salad.
It wasnât too unhealthy in content but was just huge.
On its own maybe not horrendous.
But it wasn't on its own!
Apres dinner I gobbled down loads of biscuits, chocolate bars, chunks of cake, and even a Pepsi Max.
By the end of the evening my blood felt proper cold and shaky.
I was stuffed, exhausted from the food overload, and feeling rough.
Turns out binge eating is not a good life plan
Who knew?
Next day it was a mateâs birthday and we enjoyed a cold sea swim which cured my âfood-overâ.
Magical things happen in that ocean.
I wandered in feeling like death warmed up.
I was tired.
I was grotty.
I was grim.
10 minutes later I had energy, and a level of mental and physical alertness, which was frankly amazing to where it was.
After the swim we went to Wetherspoons for breakfast.
Wetherspoons is a UK chain pub renowned for cheap beer, food and coffee.
Oh no!
You see where this is going donât you?!
Yep, before I knew it I was knee deep in an âAmerican breakfastâ and coffee.
Refillable coffees for ÂŁ1.59 is just such a BAD CONCEPT for me.
I love a latte but also know that Iâm quite caffeine sensitive.
So normally have 1 or 2 in a day.
Not 3 in half an hour.
I normally donât sugar my coffee.
But soon my little candida gremlins were out and I was wacking 2 sugars in each.
In total I did 3 coffees, 6 sugars, bacon, pancakes, maple syrup, sausages and mushrooms (because you know vegetable health gainz đđ).
I barely remember my bike ride home.
It was fast.
And furious.
The combo of quick release carbs, caffeine and the afterglow of my swim was most energizing.
I was bouncing around and proper jolly all morning.
I did have the sense to have no more coffee which was a good thing.
Then I took my kids round the shops in the afternoon.
I had a small Subway with chicken, salad, and no sauce and avoided the all you can drink Pepsi Max machine.
So I stabilised a bit.
By mid afternoon I was slumping.
Proper tired.
Feeling my inner Grinch breaking free.
I craved an apple which made good sense.
Natural sugars and rehydrating powers.
So I took my kids to a little Tesco (supermarket) to choose snacks.
One daughter was considering her options for what seemed like ages.
I was finding the shop a bit busy and overstimulating so tried to hurry her up.
Bad move.
She felt really rushed and got upset.
I was impatient, worn out, and hanging on for my apple.
Not a good situation.
What did I do?
Miraculously in all that mess my brain said PAUSE.
I did.
Took a few breaths.
Composed myself.
Then adopted a calmer and kinder voice.
âI'm sorry I rushed you. Take your time. There's no hurryâ.
A snack was then chosen.
We left the shop and I hugged my daughter as we walked to the car and I apologised again.
She was calmer and forgave me my Grinchy dad moment.
Once again a little mindful tool had saved me from my own clumsy stupid insensitive egotistical self again.
Thank goodness for that.
And the moral of the story?
Avoid excess food and caffeine.
Imagine that!
And if you do over-indulge take deep breaths, tune into your mood, and donât be a selfish idiot take out your unhealthy feelings on others around you.
Happy Sunday,
JFT BeachÂ
Article I Wrote on Substack This Week:
How to Find Positivity in Everyday Life: From Laundry to Love to Skipping in the Sea - The importance of love and compassion in life.
A Note I Shared on Substack This Week:
5 Health and Wellness Articles I Enjoyed on Substack This Week:
The Trans Doll A heart felt and important message about the acceptance of difference, by loving mum
"Being Mindful Sounds Tedious!" A helpful read for those getting into mindfulness but fear it being⌠well⌠boring! Thanks
Loving Generously Is A Super Power An ode to love, via The Shawshank Redemption, from the queen of Mindful
Nice. Easy. Read.ÂWarning: Put on your oxygen mask now! Important advice on self care which relates to ALL of us, from
9 weird ways to be more memorable as an online writer Need a bit of Writing inspiration?
should blow the cobwebs off your writers block.
I hope you enjoyed todayâs little compendium. If you did, please do me a favour and re-stack it, or add a comment below. Iâd REALLY REALLY appreciate it.
To Lazy Sunday Afternoons,
JFT Beach
PS Thanks to the following for⌠well⌠following!
Yep this week the following lovely people have started following me on Substack thanks to all of you
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Please drop links to any new and interesting Substack articles youâve read lately as Iâm always looking for more to share on a Sunday.
The domino effect of small choices by JFT Beach lol
It's also brilliant how you use humor to explore addiction patterns. That line about 'getting value for money with fizzy drinks' hits uncomfortably close to home for anyone who's ever rationalized their way into excess. It's the small self-destructive habits, not the big dramatic ones, that usually derail us.
Have a good week ahead :)
btw - I took my Hobbit out to breakfast this morning and asked for decaf coffee while Hobbit requested full caff. The server came back with two full pots, giving us permission to refill our own cups at will. Big mistake, as I do believe the pots were given to us reversed. Hobbit got the decaf and I got the energy zap. Here it is 4pm and my limbs are still twitching and jiggling. I'm so super sensitive to caffeine, haven't ingested it (on purpose) for years. I made the decision today to never order coffee in a restaurant again, lest they accidentally or accidentally-on-purpose give me full caff. Sheesh...will I even sleep tonight?