From Sauna Gossip to Jealous Travel Epiphanies: Lessons on Happiness PART 2...
The Sunday Best Round Up #29
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Today is part 2 of my epic tale “December 23rd”.
It's a standalone piece so feel free to read on, but if you're one of those context driven guys or gals then part 1 is here.
We pick up where our heroic protagonist (that'll be me) is dressed in very non elegant pink Hawaiian board shorts and heading into the sauna at the local gym.
A place of warmth.
Silence.
Introspection.
To be alone with thoughts about the festive season.
And be all zenny and yummy (yummy and zenny?) in most awfully mindful ways.
Or not… as the case happened to be...
As when I opened the sauna door; there were about 8 sweaty br others and sisters chatting away in excited, frantic, festive tones.
They felt like the human equivalent of bright christmas lights, shiny dancing Elf's, and loud seasonal music …
(probably the Alvin and the Chipmunks classic “The Chipmunk Song - Christmas Don't Be Late” if I had to choose the exact soundtrack)…
When what really I wanted was a beautifully plain pine tree with perhaps a hint of festive Harp music playing quietly and ethereal-like in the corner. With maybe an, admittedly hot ‘n’ sweaty, single white dove gracefully flapping.
But hey ho in the words of the great spiritual leader that is Sir Michael of Jagger…
“You can't always get what you want.”
So in this less than perfect situation I did what any spiritually aware person would do.
I closed my eyes.
Focussed on my breath.
And strained my ears to see if there was any dramatic or salacious gossip to be heard!
(Our local gym is at the university and a friend of mine once told me "it was like listening to am episode of Love Island” when she sat in there amongst the libidinous young 20 somethings one day).
This day there was no ‘naughty stuff’, but there was a lot of chat about travelling.
Hiking in Albania, the beauty of Croatia, and a little known Moroccan beach with world beating surf.
As the folks tossed back and forth their travel recommendations and experiences I felt a strong emotion.
In true green ‘Wicked’ style (as I'd seen the move the previous day) it was:
J
E
A
L
O
U
S
Y
I had been to NONE of the places they mentioned.
In fact I've been barely been abroad in the last 15 years.
A combination of being skint from having 3 kids, 1 daughter refusing to fly for eco reasons, and then the addition of 2 rescue dogs who would be so traumatised at going to kennels; we always holiday in the UK.
And tbh the UK has some great spots.
We always have a fun filled time and the dogs get to sniff lots of different fields.
Everyone's a winner.
And 99% of the time I am totally fine with not travelling abroad.
Much that there are many great places in the world to see…
Life is about what you make of it.
In each and every moment.
I can be amazingly happy sea swimming 10 minutes from my house on a dark February Monday morning… so the lure of exictic foreign lands is not uber strong for me.
UNTIL I sit with people telling travel tales.
How this place is so amazing.
How beautiful this place is.
How you simply MUST go to this place.
Then suddenly I'm in a jealous fog of Albanian snow encrusted mountains, clear blue Croatian waters, and surfing fat waves in Morocco
NOTE - I cannot surf at all and struggle to stay on a boogie board at our beach in summer with tiny piddling waves, which shows how silly this whole jealousy game is!
All the “Why me’s?” started up in my head mourning the missed opportunities, experiences, and life-affirming cool things I've never done.
But then one of my fellow saunees (is that a word?) said something interesting.
He said that he finds that there are always people telling him about different places.
New beaches.
New mountain ranges.
New waterfalls.
His to do list was always getting bigger and he'd never get them all done, which was frustrating.
And at that point my sauna enhanced hot jealousy evaporated.
All this travelling lark can easily become just another addiction.
A distraction.
Whilst it is no doubt fun and an amazing thing to visit places around the world.
You're still you.
You take yourself to these places.
You bring yourself back.
And if you're not happy, and more importantly, do things to make yourself happy on the regular (eg meditation, mindfulness, exercise, altruistic acts etc) then the next amazing sunset, waterfall or swim with a dolphin is just another short lived dopamine hit.
Until the next… and the next… and the next…
Always chasing.
Never really fulfilled.
At this point I stood up and informed them of the folly of their ways.
Nah not really bruv! 😁
I shuffled out to drink water as I was proper thirsty at that point, and set about my journey to the beach for a cold seasonal dip, and that boys and girls ends today's tale.
Next Sunday bring part 3 in this most epic of odyssey’s… which gives us excess car sweat (euugghh!) , the joy of community and underwater handstands.
Until then.
Happy Sunday,
JFT Beach
Article I Wrote on Substack This Week:
The Floor Cleaning Secrets of a Yogic, Sauna Martyr (Who Upsets Dogs) PART 1...- Just another fun little festive tale of day to day foolishness and attempting to stay sane.
A note I share on Substack this week:
5 Health and Wellness Articles I Enjoyed on Substack This Week:
Powerlessness as Practice: From Property Chains to Pure Land Buddhism - An ancient Buddhist Take on the modern phenomena of house moves from
Vaster and More Slow - A little look at how we struggle when out of routine and the joy of cold water slaps! Thanks
Not My Circus, Not My Monkeys - How to cope with media and not get upset by the ( bad) news from
24 lessons on life, love, and choosing what matters most - I LOVES me a list-icle and this new year one, full of solid life advice from
, doesn’t disappointTriangle Breathing: An Alternative to Overhyped Navy SEAL Box Breathing Breath expert
schools us in a style she views more helpful than box breathing…
I hope you enjoyed this week’s newsletter,
If you did, please do me a favour and re-stack it, or add a comment below. OR JUST LIKE… Y’KNOW… DO BOTH 😁. I’d REALLY REALLY appreciate it.
To Lazy Sunday Afternoons,
JFT Beach
PS Thanks to the following for… well… following!
Yep this week the following lovely people have started following me on Substack thanks to all of you
Your December 23rd saga = festive rollercoaster with a side of zen :)
I agree with your thoughts on finding fulfillment in the NOW.
You’re right - no matter where we go, we still bring ourselves with us!
My travel "abroad" has consisted of chaperoning a high school trip to Canada, a cruise to Bermuda, and a plane ride to Jamaica. I've never crossed the pond, although I'd like to reach Hawaii one day, but I don't think that counts as "abroad." I'm quite content with the Jersey and Delaware beaches although long ago when I taught at a posh boarding school, the students would lament that Mommy and Daddy had forced them to go on yet another jaunt to France. Poor things.